Update on the Bear's sentence

I've been asked to provide an update on Lordy's ban situation.

A plea bargain was arranged by partners Yuzgen and Rushyboo with CnCNet admins. In it, Lordy pleads guilty to all charges and will serve 3 months in RA Jail with a further 1 year on probation upon release (having to go for weekly therapy sessions and a counsellor for the following 9 months to work on anger management issues). If Lordy keeps its head down and doesn't step on other prisoners' toes then it will be uncaged and allowed to return to the CnCNet woods in July.

In exchange for a guilty plea the maximum life sentence has been reduced.

Yuzgen will accept postcards if you want to write to the bear while it serves its 3 months sentence.

Thanks all and I'm glad we can now draw a line under the saga, so long as the bear serves its 3 month sentence on good behaviour.

Thanks,

el crushiolo fabuloso

RA APRIL 2023 GOAT NEWS

 As you know I'm inactive from Red Alert at present. An anonymous source has asked me to provide the following updates on the status of the Red Alert Community.

The main news is that Dynamic has lost his spot to Gganbu and Bea5ty. Ggganbu and Bea5ty have been pumping the German 18-pint gestapo lieutenant after the quicklaunch was banned by admins behind the scenes. Any thoughts on this? Mmmm. Maybe no as good without quick launch mmm. BARTFUCKINGSAMA owns all. That is the only comment I have to make on this issue I don't really care about who wins and who loses at the game.

In other news. You all know by now that the man known alternatively as "The Bear" and "The Ogre", aka Lordy, has been permanently banned from Red Alert by the bongcloud mushroom LSD trip admin known as N8Diaz. Diaz was maybe a wee bit too harsh with his punishment and most agree that a week ban would have sufficed after a drunken Lordy called everyone an arab cunt in the lobby and threatened to go to people's houses and decapitate them with a chainsaw or burn them alive. Don't you agree? A week would have been enough ban for this.

Anyway, Lordy's doing just fine as an old pal of his got in touch to offer him a new home:

Thanks for reading!

Crushy Fucking GOD Boo (Fuck all butlers everywhere except Budofuckingwouter the undisputed GOAT butler!)

Statement on Dynamic's finger porn

Congratulations to Dynamic for showing his cocktail sausage fingers on stream and proving that he isn't using keyboard macros. We might need a foot pedal camera next (lol).

Those fingers have definitely seen a few pizzas. Got a real Lordy vibe. Played that keyboard with immense precision like someone slicing up the salami. Years of experience and skill was clearly evident.

Fair enough I was wrong. Good job and thanks for giving peace of mind.

I must say it was a bit creepy that the lights were off, do you sit and play with a scream mask on as well? 

Unfortunately I didn't catch the stream live and didn't even realise it was happening. However I've gone back and watched the replay just now. It's crystal clear that you don't cheat you just have natural born autism which is giving you the edge over us amateurs. 

Good job, now get off  that wank-station and get a job.

On a serious note, well done and thanks.

Congratulations are in order!

 Congratulations to Gganbu in successfully securing the services of the reigning Butler of the Year on a freelance contract. Yes that's right, the BOTY2022, Ad, (formerly cousinad,[op-ad],[nm-ad],nastyad,[1]ad,[ad-ta],[420]ad,[G0D]ad,RAM-ad,[BAT-Ad],RPG-Ad,[wp]Ad,[Ex-Ad] etc) has now completed the full house and joined ORA to personally butler for the mysterious entity known as Gganbu. I'm sure this will be a match made in heaven and many greasy arse holes will be getting cleaned to a pristine standard.

As monumental news as this is, it may not be enough to retain the BOTY title this year because an old wolf has come back hungry to regain his title! 

Take notes, Ad. You'll always be the rank 2 Butler on CnCNet. Budo shows how it's done properly. And to answer the question of the GOAT Butler - I'll have some Camembert and some Sauvignon, fetch me your finest Cuban cigar as well while you are in the pantry, boy!

The BOTY 2023 title race is sure to be an epic one. Get those dishes washed boys! #TeamBudo

In less important news, I'm still waiting on the German to answer my request in the last post which clearly stated and I quote "Stream playing for an hour against a strong opponent such as Gganbu with a webcam clearly on keyboard/mouse as well as the screen." A small graphical animation in the bottom left corner does not meet the requirements of the stipulated aforementioned drugs test. Ball firmly in your fucking court, cunt.

Happy reading and have a wonderful day.

Request of Dynamic

Stream playing for an hour against a strong opponent such as Gganbu with a webcam clearly on keyboard/mouse as well as the screen.

Save the video for YouTube/Twitch for analysis. 

Too many people are suspicious and have seen statistical anomalies.

If you are clean then you should have absolutely no problem doing this. There is no excuse not to, really. See it as a standard drugs test like they have in the Olympics. Innocent until proven guilty.

If you refuse to do it then the silence will speak louder than words.

Thank you.